How to walk like a New Yorker

You can talk the talk, but can you walk the walk?

Walking in any big, overpopulated city such as New York can be seen as a competitive sport. Your gait, your pace, your shoes, your 'tude: they're all important factors to your success in getting from point A to point B, and everywhere that inevitably comes up in between. Whether you're living the corporate dream or just trying to find the best bagel, your feet, your mind, your willpower, and these tips will help get you there.

Embrace your sensible footwear

Real fact: You can always spot a tourist in New York by their footwear and their bag. But true New Yorkers can rock the dress and sneakers look whether in the Village or in Midtown. It's better than waddling in heels. If you decide to wear heels, you better know how to walk in them. But if you want to preserve your strength and your dignity, throw your ego out the door and don some supportive souls.

Don't be slow

The only people that are allowed to walk slowly in New York are those that have limited mobility, dogs with tiny legs, and children who have yet to develop all of their motor skills. You, as an able-bodied person, have no excuse not to walk at a brisk pace, whether you are in a rush or have all the time in the world. New York walkers are like animals in a stampede; when you stop, you're pretty much a goner. So do those calf raises and get up to speed.

No distractions

Wow, you think you're so cool that you can text and walk at the same time? Well, the reality is, you can't! Go ahead, drop your phone down a sewer or trip over a rouge binky in the street. When you're walking, especially in a crowded city, you need to be fully aware of your surroundings. Really, if you value your life at all, you shouldn't text or listen to loud music. Your safety is more important.

Learn how to pull over

You wouldn't just stop your car in the middle of a highway if you realized you were going the wrong way, would you? Same thing goes for walking. If you have this realization, do not stop! Simply find an opening, walk calmly over, and park yourself out of harm's way to reevaluate your shoddy GPS.

Learn umbrella politics

In the event that it is raining in New York City, extra walking hazards make themselves quickly known. Do not be that jerk with an umbrella for a family of twelve. This will make others around you instantly dislike you for taking up too much room on the street. Invest in an individual umbrella and learn how to stagger its height when walking into a crowd of oncoming umbrellas.

Onward, young tourist!

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